Food Monstrosities

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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby CubInOK » Sat Oct 21, 2017 6:55 pm



I thought this said "onion gravy" at first.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby The Logan » Sat Oct 21, 2017 7:19 pm

Somewhat related hot take: Open-faced sandwiches are horsefeathering stupid.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Tim » Sat Oct 21, 2017 7:50 pm

The Logan wrote:Somewhat related hot take: Open-faced sandwiches are horsefeathering stupid.

#notasandwich
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Ding Dong Johnson » Sun Oct 22, 2017 12:11 am

you people are monsters. a good hot beef sandwich beats damn near anything ever concocted
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby bukie » Sun Oct 22, 2017 12:55 am

Whoever runs the KFC twitter account deserves some recognition...

The account follows the Spice girls, and six random guys named Herb...which means KFC twitter follows 11 herbs and spices.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sun Oct 22, 2017 1:13 am

Ding Dong Johnson wrote:you people are monsters. a good hot beef sandwich beats damn near anything ever concocted


Yeah, a sandwich; not a dumb single piece of bread with horsefeathers piled on top of it.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby minnesotacubsfan » Sun Oct 22, 2017 1:58 am

Sammy Sofa wrote:
Ding Dong Johnson wrote:you people are monsters. a good hot beef sandwich beats damn near anything ever concocted


Yeah, a sandwich; not a dumb single piece of bread with horsefeathers piled on top of it.

wtf are you talking about. roast beef, gravy and cheese over a single thick texas toast can put man on mars its so horsefeathering good
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sun Oct 22, 2017 2:02 am

Sounds great, but it's not a sandwich.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sun Oct 22, 2017 2:14 am

Has anyone else had a chance to try these "bleeding" veggie burgers that have rolled out within the last year? I've tried the Beyond Burger and was really impressed; if I hadn't know it was a veggie burger I would have just assumed it was someone's kinda herb-y take on a regular meat burger. Now Impossible Foods has locked down a deal to start serving their version in cafeterias and dining halls:

http://www.grubstreet.com/2017/10/bleed ... erias.html

I'm horsefeathering sold on the things, and I never expected to actually be into a veggie burger. I think one of the coolest possibilities of food science is being able to create meat substitutes or synthetic meat that actually tastes like horsefeathering meat. Now, if only they weren't ridiculously expensive...
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Banedon » Sun Oct 22, 2017 2:53 pm

And open faced sandwich is a sandwich...it just has too much goodness piled in it to close properly. This is not a negative.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sun Oct 22, 2017 3:08 pm

Banedon wrote:And open faced sandwich is a sandwich...it just has too much goodness piled in it to close properly. This is not a negative.


Not judging whether it tastes good or not; it's just obviously is not a sandwich. The mere presence of bread does not a sandwich make.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby MidoreX » Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:12 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:Has anyone else had a chance to try these "bleeding" veggie burgers that have rolled out within the last year? I've tried the Beyond Burger and was really impressed; if I hadn't know it was a veggie burger I would have just assumed it was someone's kinda herb-y take on a regular meat burger. Now Impossible Foods has locked down a deal to start serving their version in cafeterias and dining halls:

http://www.grubstreet.com/2017/10/bleed ... erias.html

I'm horsefeathering sold on the things, and I never expected to actually be into a veggie burger. I think one of the coolest possibilities of food science is being able to create meat substitutes or synthetic meat that actually tastes like horsefeathering meat. Now, if only they weren't ridiculously expensive...


Haven't tried it, but Kuma's just added a burger with it to their menu... So it's gotta be kinda good right?
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:42 pm

MidoreX wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:Has anyone else had a chance to try these "bleeding" veggie burgers that have rolled out within the last year? I've tried the Beyond Burger and was really impressed; if I hadn't know it was a veggie burger I would have just assumed it was someone's kinda herb-y take on a regular meat burger. Now Impossible Foods has locked down a deal to start serving their version in cafeterias and dining halls:

http://www.grubstreet.com/2017/10/bleed ... erias.html

I'm horsefeathering sold on the things, and I never expected to actually be into a veggie burger. I think one of the coolest possibilities of food science is being able to create meat substitutes or synthetic meat that actually tastes like horsefeathering meat. Now, if only they weren't ridiculously expensive...


Haven't tried it, but Kuma's just added a burger with it to their menu... So it's gotta be kinda good right?


Man, so long as it tastes like a good burger, I don't care what the hell it's made out of.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:25 pm

Haribo, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO:

https://www.avclub.com/sorry-but-haribo ... 1819880067

The days when we were concerned—or at least, I was, being an earnest teenager in a Clash T-shirt—about Starbucks putting local coffee shops out of business seem so quaint and far away now, curled up in a cozy sweater knit in a Vietnamese sweatshop reading articles on an iPhone about how the carnauba wax and animal gelatin in Haribo gummy candies are extracted by underpaid Brazilian workers and from pigs caked in their own feces. Oh, you hadn’t heard about Haribo gummies? Let us ruin those for you as well, then.


The terrible conditions under which Haribo sources these key ingredients—carnauba wax makes the gummies glossy and keeps them from sticking together, and animal gelatin is what makes them, well, gummy—were exposed last week in a documentary from German public broadcaster ARD. The documentary found that the carnauba wax, which comes from trees that only grow in northeastern Brazil, was being harvested by workers, some of them underage, who “ are forced to sleep outside or in trucks, have no access to toilets and have to drink unfiltered water straight from nearby rivers.” These conditions have come to the attention of Brazilian authorities, who carry out occasional raids to free workers from the plantations, from conditions a Brazilian labor official says “could be described as slavery.”

Meanwhile, back in Germany, the factory farms where the animal gelatin in the candies is sourced from pig skin are similarly deplorable. English-language German news source Deutsche Welle describes footage from animal-rights activists included in the documentary that “showed pigs with open sores and abscesses living in indoor pens in their own excrement, and in some cases among their own dead.” In response, the companies in the supply chain that eventually comes around to delicious gummy bears, meat producer Westfleisch and gelatin producer Gelita, say that were “not aware” of any violations of German anti-cruelty law and that measures for “species appropriate animal farming” were in place at the farms.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Transmogrified Tiger » Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:33 pm

why is that an AV club article
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:57 pm

Transmogrified Tiger wrote:why is that an AV club article


I'm pretty sure they just spin a wheel to decide which Univision site a story ends up on these days.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:57 pm

But, more importantly, I have an unopened 5 pound bag of gummi German evil sitting at home that is going to be judging me.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:59 pm

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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby MWV » Thu Oct 26, 2017 7:10 pm

Haribo CEO Arthur Slugworth could not be reached for comment.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby The Logan » Fri Oct 27, 2017 4:46 pm

Banedon wrote:And open faced sandwich is a sandwich...it just has too much goodness piled in it to close properly. This is not a negative.


I feel like an open-faced sandwich is a chef/cook's way of saying all these ingredients taste great together but they're too lazy to present it in any other way than piling them on top of one another so they just toss a piece of bread in there and are like "It's a sandwich now!"

Just call it what it is or give it a stupid name
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby jersey cubs fan » Fri Oct 27, 2017 4:55 pm

The Logan wrote:
Banedon wrote:And open faced sandwich is a sandwich...it just has too much goodness piled in it to close properly. This is not a negative.


I feel like an open-faced sandwich is a chef/cook's way of saying all these ingredients taste great together but they're too lazy to present it in any other way than piling them on top of one another so they just toss a piece of bread in there and are like "It's a sandwich now!"

Just call it what it is or give it a stupid name

It's not too lazy to combine, it allows you to pile an insane amount of sloppy food on the bread, which wouldn't last in hand holding sandwich form.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby biittner77 » Fri Oct 27, 2017 5:22 pm

related story: I got an Italian beef at O'Hare and it came with a knife and fork. It got me thinking that it would make sense to eat a wet Italian beef sandwich with a knife and fork but I would dismiss such an idea out of hand.
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Fri Oct 27, 2017 5:39 pm

jersey cubs fan wrote:
The Logan wrote:
Banedon wrote:And open faced sandwich is a sandwich...it just has too much goodness piled in it to close properly. This is not a negative.


I feel like an open-faced sandwich is a chef/cook's way of saying all these ingredients taste great together but they're too lazy to present it in any other way than piling them on top of one another so they just toss a piece of bread in there and are like "It's a sandwich now!"

Just call it what it is or give it a stupid name

It's not too lazy to combine, it allows you to pile an insane amount of sloppy food on the bread, which wouldn't last in sandwich form.


FTfY
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Fri Oct 27, 2017 5:43 pm

Look at it this way: if you're eating food of a plate, that's one thing. If you put that plate in the toilet and continue eating, I'm sorry, but you are now eating out of the toilet, regardless of the presence of the plate.

A pile of food on bread may have at one point been a sandwich, but it long ago abandoned being a sandwich the point that it became an unwieldy pile of food on some bread.

I realize this analogy is basically a complete failure, but I just wanted to be able to say, "stop eating out of the toilet, you open faced liars."
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Re: Food Monstrosities

Postby Banedon » Fri Oct 27, 2017 5:52 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:Look at it this way: if you're eating food of a plate, that's one thing. If you put that plate in the toilet and continue eating, I'm sorry, but you are now eating out of the toilet, regardless of the presence of the plate.

A pile of food on bread may have at one point been a sandwich, but it long ago abandoned being a sandwich the point that it became an unwieldy pile of food on some bread.

I realize this analogy is basically a complete failure, but I just wanted to be able to say, "stop eating out of the toilet, you open faced liars."


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