Food Monstrosities

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Sammy Sofa
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Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:30 pm

Burger King is actually selling something called an "extra long buttery cheeseburger?" Reminded me of how something like "Culver's butter burger" always sounded horrifying to me. I'm assuming/hoping they're just toasting a buttery bun or something, but still, that image just grosses me the horsefeathers out. The last thing I want slathered on red meat is horsefeathering butter of any kind.
Last edited by Sammy Sofa on Sat Feb 04, 2017 11:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby cl smooth » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:36 pm

av club reviewed the extra long buttery cheeseburger:

http://www.avclub.com/article/burger-ki ... m-a-233315

it sounds horsefeathering disgusting.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby mul21 » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:36 pm

You're crazy. A little bit of garlic herb butter melted over a sizzling steak is absolutely amazing.

This Burger King deal sounds a little sketchy though.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:41 pm

cl smooth wrote:av club reviewed the extra long buttery cheeseburger:

http://www.avclub.com/article/burger-ki ... m-a-233315

it sounds [expletive] disgusting.


Ugh.

I haven't been to a BK in a long time, but I remember how weirdly dry their meat was. They've gotta be on the bottom of the fast food heap.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:48 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:Burger King is actually selling something called an "extra long buttery cheeseburger?" Reminded me of how something like "Culver's butter burger" always sounded horrifying to me. I'm assuming/hoping they're just toasting a buttery bun or something, but still, that image just grosses me the [expletive] out. The last thing I want slathered on red meat is [expletive] butter of any kind.


Culver's burgers are great...how have you never had one? I thought you were a fat guy.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:49 pm

cl smooth wrote:av club reviewed the extra long buttery cheeseburger:

http://www.avclub.com/article/burger-ki ... m-a-233315

it sounds [expletive] disgusting.


lol wtf?

so they just took the bread from their classic chicken sandwich and tossed some burger patties in it?
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:50 pm

No desire to ever go to one. Plus when I lived in Chicago I rarely went to fast food chains. Too many better options to tempt me.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:50 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:
cl smooth wrote:av club reviewed the extra long buttery cheeseburger:

http://www.avclub.com/article/burger-ki ... m-a-233315

it sounds [expletive] disgusting.


Ugh.

I haven't been to a BK in a long time, but I remember how weirdly dry their meat was. They've gotta be on the bottom of the fast food heap.


better than mcdonalds

wendys is the clear winner of the big 3 in terms of burgers tho. not even close.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:51 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:No desire to ever go to one. Plus when I lived in Chicago I rarely went to fast food chains. Too many better options to tempt me.


well, the burgers are pretty damn good, especially by chain standards. fries are trash and the cheese curds are kinda crappy too, though.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:53 pm

For all the issues with terrible McDonald's food, I never regularly got a sandwich from them that seemed like all of the moisture had been sucked out if it like nearly every one from BK did.

Wendy's is pretty much the only one of those chains I'll still occasionally get. If they brought back their mushroom bacon budget melt thing I'd probably end up dead.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:54 pm

David wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:No desire to ever go to one. Plus when I lived in Chicago I rarely went to fast food chains. Too many better options to tempt me.


well, the burgers are pretty damn good, especially by chain standards. fries are trash and the cheese curds are kinda crappy too, though.


Every time I've had cheese curds I've always ended up thinking, "man, I'd much rather have some cheese sticks instead." They really can't do anything right in Wisconsin.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby glavine93 » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:00 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:Burger King is actually selling something called an "extra long buttery cheeseburger?" Reminded me of how something like "Culver's butter burger" always sounded horrifying to me. I'm assuming/hoping they're just toasting a buttery bun or something, but still, that image just grosses me the [expletive] out. The last thing I want slathered on red meat is [expletive] butter of any kind.


culver's butterburgers are pretty tame. this S&S offering, on the other hand, actually looks like this:Image
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:02 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:
David wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:No desire to ever go to one. Plus when I lived in Chicago I rarely went to fast food chains. Too many better options to tempt me.


well, the burgers are pretty damn good, especially by chain standards. fries are trash and the cheese curds are kinda crappy too, though.


Every time I've had cheese curds I've always ended up thinking, "man, I'd much rather have some cheese sticks instead." They really can't do anything right in Wisconsin.


no no no

real wisconsin cheese curds are heaven...the cheese curds at culvers, however, suck
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:08 pm

*Shrug* I've had them at places deep in the wilds of WI where supposedly they're "the most amazing cheese curds EVER!!!" and they just seem like really chewy reject cheese lumps that have been deep fried. Not my thing.

Though I did love stopping at the Mars Cheese Castle. And my favorite pies in the world are from the Norske Nook, so I guess WI does do some things OK.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:08 pm

glavine93 wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:Burger King is actually selling something called an "extra long buttery cheeseburger?" Reminded me of how something like "Culver's butter burger" always sounded horrifying to me. I'm assuming/hoping they're just toasting a buttery bun or something, but still, that image just grosses me the [expletive] out. The last thing I want slathered on red meat is [expletive] butter of any kind.


culver's butterburgers are pretty tame. this S&S offering, on the other hand, actually looks like this:Image


The most disconcerting part is how the bottom bun looks like it's sponge cake.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby OleMissCub » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:14 pm

Five Guys takes the cake as far as greasy ass burgers. They are pretty damn fine tho.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Ryne Ween » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:45 pm

Haven't had a fast food burger (except shake shack if that counts I tried it) in a while. Unfortunately if I'm getting a burger someplace it's killing me quicker than BK would ever spend the COGS to match.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Derwood » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:56 pm

Did the Fork & Screen last night at the movies, and they had surprisingly good food. Had a burger with bacon, brie, arugula and fig jam.

It was like 1800 calories but YOLO
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby CubInOK » Sat Mar 12, 2016 7:59 pm

Since this is the place to discuss burgers...

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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 8:21 pm

Damn you always have crazy amazing Oklahoma fat people stuff to show us
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy's Boombox » Sat Mar 12, 2016 8:21 pm

David wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:No desire to ever go to one. Plus when I lived in Chicago I rarely went to fast food chains. Too many better options to tempt me.


well, the burgers are pretty damn good, especially by chain standards. fries are trash and the cheese curds are kinda crappy too, though.


The fish and chips meals (they're like $11 or $12) are incredible. It's not like you're eating fast food.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby NOLA » Sat Mar 12, 2016 8:31 pm

OleMissCub wrote:Five Guys takes the cake as far as greasy ass burgers. They are pretty damn fine tho.

I honestly have not had any fast food in almost 10 years, unless you count pizza. That is, except for Five Guys. That is a damn good burger, and their fries rock too.
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby seanimal » Sat Mar 12, 2016 9:12 pm

Sammy Sofa wrote:*Shrug* I've had them at places deep in the wilds of WI where supposedly they're "the most amazing cheese curds EVER!!!" and they just seem like really chewy reject cheese lumps that have been deep fried. Not my thing.

Though I did love stopping at the Mars Cheese Castle. And my favorite pies in the world are from the Norske Nook, so I guess WI does do some things OK.


norske nook has some crazy good pies. i could probably eat an entire sour cream raspberry pie and feel zero self loathing

cheese curds are best when they're very fresh and un-fried; the "squeakers" as they say. they can be good fried, but like a light fry with a thin, crispy breading and just enough to goo the cheese but not liquify
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby David » Sat Mar 12, 2016 9:26 pm

seanimal wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:*Shrug* I've had them at places deep in the wilds of WI where supposedly they're "the most amazing cheese curds EVER!!!" and they just seem like really chewy reject cheese lumps that have been deep fried. Not my thing.

Though I did love stopping at the Mars Cheese Castle. And my favorite pies in the world are from the Norske Nook, so I guess WI does do some things OK.


norske nook has some crazy good pies. i could probably eat an entire sour cream raspberry pie and feel zero self loathing

cheese curds are best when they're very fresh and un-fried; the "squeakers" as they say. they can be good fried, but like a light fry with a thin, crispy breading and just enough to goo the cheese but not liquify


that's how i like them best too
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Re: Fast Food Monstrosities

Postby Sammy Sofa » Sat Mar 12, 2016 10:32 pm

seanimal wrote:
Sammy Sofa wrote:*Shrug* I've had them at places deep in the wilds of WI where supposedly they're "the most amazing cheese curds EVER!!!" and they just seem like really chewy reject cheese lumps that have been deep fried. Not my thing.

Though I did love stopping at the Mars Cheese Castle. And my favorite pies in the world are from the Norske Nook, so I guess WI does do some things OK.


norske nook has some crazy good pies. i could probably eat an entire sour cream raspberry pie and feel zero self loathing


I really didn't like cream pies at all before going there. Holy horsefeathers; talk about life-changing.
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